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Apart from this oversight – which is bound to have been the result of a marketing meeting at which someone stood up und said, ‘Zer is no such sing as ein sporty car mitt five seats’ – the only problem is the positioning of the accelerator pedal. The car may be able to keep going when the weather would rather it didn’t, thanks to four-wheel drive. But if you are wearing the sort of shoes that enabled you to get through the snow to the car in the first place, you will end up pressing the brake pedal every time you want to go faster.. I’ve had the car for a week and because I’ve enjoyed the noise it makes so much, I’ve averaged just 38 mpg. I got more from the hot Fiat 500 Abarth. And to make the economy argument even less palatable, the TwinAir costs around ?1,000 more than a similarly specced model that has twice as manycylinders. So it’s not cheap to buy and, unless you have the will power of a donkey, it’s not cheap to run, either.. I tried the new Ford Falcon FPV Boss 335 GT when I was over there and it struck me that someone had spent a few quid on the engine and then nothing at all on anything else. I’m told this is how it should be when you are upside down. Which you will be if you try to make it go round a corner.. Overall, I liked this car. It was exciting when I was in the mood, but strangely docile and comfortable when I wasn’t. I like the way it feels different from everything else on the road, and I’m not bothered about the four-wheel-drive system either way. But that rear end? They really should have had a look at Pippa Middleton before they made merry with the ballpoints.10 July 2011. You may remember that recently onTop Gear I brought news of a half-million-pound E-type Jaguar. Built by a company in East Sussex called Eagle, it was the most beautiful man-made thing I’d ever seen. Better than the Humber Bridge. Better than the Riva Aquarama, even.. And can we also pause for a moment to think about the real benefits of four-wheel drive. If it were necessary in inclement weather, the Swedes would have embraced it warmly as a tool for masking their perfectly ordinary driving skills. But they haven’t. You rarely see an off-roader up here. Mostly they drive what people drive in Leamington Spa.. Emissions regulations have had other effects as well. The engine now shuts down at the lights and Porsche has had to fit a seven-speed gearbox. In theory this is fine. You lope up the motorway at tickover, sipping fuel like a vicar sips sherry. But when you’re in seventh, doing 60 mph, you don’t get the twitching and fizzing you expect from a car of this type. It feels a bit puddingy.. Vauxhall Astra VXR 2.0i Turbo. None of these things, however, should prevent you from buying what is a well-engineered and well-executed car. But what might cause you to think twice is the bovine trinketry, the high price and the fact you have to tell people at parties that you’ve bought a Vauxhall Astra.. For the business of going fast, a Nissan GT-R is unbeatable. But for fun – and I am not exaggerating here – you would be better off in a Morris Minor on cross-plies.. Also, when you are feeling low and miserable, there’s no waitress in the world who will pass muster. She may be smiley and lovely and knowledgeable, but because you are consumed by an overwhelming need to be in bed, with your teddy bear and some warm milk, you will sit there, as she runs you through the specials of the day, wondering how she might look without a head.. You know those turtles that lay eggs so far up a beach that there is no way their young will make it back into the sea without being fried or eaten? Well, they would make better drivers than me when I’m poorly.. I’ve never heard anything so pointless. What did these people hope to achieve by sitting there, leaning on their hooters? Did they imagine that the coaches would simply disappear, crumbling to dust in the barrage of decibels? Or did they think that the noise would cause the offending drivers to think more clearly about how a solution might be found?. My colleagues onTop Gear always refer to the various 911 incarnations by their model numbers and say the type 993 wasn’t as good-looking as the 996, and the 997 doesn’t have quite the right stance. To me it’s like looking at a field full of babies. No matter where in the world they come from, they are all the same.. I know the rules, of course. No man over the age of thirty-eight can drive a car with the roof down when he can be seen by other people, as it sends out all the wrong messages. You think you look good on the high street, sitting in the sun. You think you come across as suave yet carefree. But to other people it looks as if your gentleman sausage no longer works properly..